Thursday 14 September 2017

Get your kitchen's act together - Part 2

Part 2 – Cleaning with a vengeance 

I’m hoping you’ve been busy giving away, throwing out or selling your un-used, cluttering kitchen crap. If you had one, how fun are garage sales by the way?

Now, my grandmother always said “cleanliness is next to godliness.” So if you want to feel really divine, clean your kitchen like a domestic god or goddess. Take out everything from your cupboards and give each and every surface in there a thorough rubber-glove-armed clean with hot water and eucalyptus oil - no need to buy gross expensive synthetic chemical crap. For the more persistent smears, nothing beats cloudy ammonia. Just ensure you have adequate ventilation and dilute it. The smell is quite severe, but it goes away quickly and takes off the most extreme grease and stains. And insects don’t like the eucalyptus smell, so you kill two birds with one stone. 

While you’re at it, clean the fridge and oven, and pull out the grease filters in the rangehood, soaking them in hot water, a few generous squeezes of dishwashing liquid and a ¼ cup of baking soda. In less than half an hour you can start scrubbing them with a non-abrasive brush or scourer. Et voilĂ ! Do beware if cleaning a gas oven with ammonia, make sure the gas and pilot light are off or your kitchen could light up like a gunpowder-laced Christmas tree. 

Now look up at the ceiling. Are there fly s*>t spots or squashed mosquito remnants anywhere? Is there a mass grave insect cemetery gracing your flush mount opaque ceiling light? No matter how clean your kitchen is down below, a grotty ceiling can ruin the effect, so get up there on a ladder armed with your eucalyptus and ammonia-infused sponge. Please note, this task, and the gas oven cleaning one should be done when completely sober. The rest could call for some hard liquor. 

So please get to it. I will give you a bit of leeway, in case you get overwhelmed easily like me and all this is daunting and giving you nausea and panic attacks at the prospect.  I’ll give you a week or two before I post the next blog, so take on bite sized tasks. Maybe do one cupboard a day and give yourself the entire weekend to clean the fridge and oven. I don’t mean spend the entire weekend doing this but make sure you accomplish the task at some point. So when we catch up next, we will be able to move forward with a beautiful kitchen, a pristine canvas, or at least a far less cluttered, filthy one. 

Remember always aspire to acquire kitchen heaven....